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@Luminita200 , there is a wealth of information overload for you to digest.
all we can do in the best way possible is to inform, and maybe direct you as what to do.
ask questions, many here have decades of experience, and many others here are still new, but have acquired great wisdom from those here that share thier experiences.
the shooting sport can be a GREAT sport/hobby, for you, but you need to apply yourself to be a proficient shooter, at the range and god forbid, in a self/home defense situation.
try not to be someone that i ACTUALLY KNOW, who went out with her husband, they both bought handguns, and put them in the closet, from day 1....and sold them to me, 3-4 months later, never out of the boxes.
keeping the gun in the closet, collecting dust, will not protect you.
practice, practice, practice....learn to take it apart, clean and lube it
and practice some more, at least once per week.
i was VERY apprehensive of getting my carry permit as well. but in time and with lots of practice, i gained confidence in my ability to shoot, and shoot well, many of my targets are on this site.
i later obtained my carry permit, and i carry with confidence in my ability, but still hope, that i never have to draw my weapon, but i will, when i have to.